This sounds really sad, but I really want a hug, I’ve been suffering mentally lately. But my problem is, I hate being hugged by people I am platonic with, friends, family etc, it makes me very uncomfortable. For some reason I love being hugged by someone who I have been intimate with how ever briefly it was for. But it’s obviously hard to explain to someone you barely know that you need that. I googled it, to see if there was any answers to why I might be like this and nothing helpful came up. Anyone got any ideas of why and how I can tackle this
Sending you loads of virtual hugs
Totally understand how you feel. It is quite an intimate thing being so physically close to someone else. My parents never hugged me loads (unlike some people’s families who are big huggers!) so I always felt more uncomfortable than other people about hugging too…
To be honest what’s helped me is gradually doing it more and more with friends and partners. It used to be way more uncomfortable but I’ve got more relaxed about it. It’s just a rubbish time at the moment with all the restrictions
Are you isolating with anyone?? Whoever you can hug, I would strongly recommend it. They’re big stress relievers and once you give in the the uncomfortable feeling, you will probably enjoy it more than you think!!
Really sorry you’re having a tricky time at the moment. You’re not alone. Things will look up soon
Hey Curvya, it doesn’t sound sad at all.
Lockdown and the lack of physical touch is really hitting home for a lot of us right about now. I think that sometimes there’s an intimacy with folks you know ‘however briefly’ that can feel unconditional and isn’t loaded with the preconceptions or emotional demands that can come with friends/family. Hopefully an e-hug from this stranger helps and please be kind to yourself until we get back to ‘normal’ soon…
Hey, I think I know how you feel. I wasn’t hugged much by my family so when it came to hugging friends at uni, it was all abit erm weird for me. Like it feels stale and a little awkward now. Fast forward, I’m the same as you, I crave hugs and touch from a partner or really close friends. But if it’s someone new, I avoid hugging or if I have to, I make a friend go first! That way I know how long the hug will last or whether it accompanies a cheek on either side. I actually cringe at the thought of it and really don’t like it! So rest assured you’re not the only one and I think this is quite common. Xx
it’s ok to just not be huge but interesting you don’t mind it from people you don’t know as much. if you’re happy, keep doing you xx
Totally agree! You do you and at your own pace! X